The Naked Guy Upstairs, Ch. 9-11Chapter 9
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I like the laid back bookworm giving Edward as much as the sexy talking Edward. He is playful and kinda dorky. I doubt he lets many people see that side of him.
I like that they are falling into a routine. Despite his no sleepover policy of the past, Edward is willingly carrying her to his bed, and making a habit of crashing on her couch. They are becoming a couple without even realizing it.
Chapter 10
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You know my favorite thing about the two of them, at the moment. Is that you totally believe they are just friends. They act and fight like friends. There are those other feelings lingering in the back of both of their minds, but they are still very much in the friend zone.
Bella's confidence is increasing, and Edward's is waning. Tuesday will be beautiful or an utter fucking disaster.
Chapter 11
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Danger, Will Robinson! DANGER!!
Why oh why could they not do this as themselves? Role playing was a BAD idea. The whole scene was beautifully written and orchestrated, but I sat cringing the whole time chanting "This is a bad idea. This is a BAD idea."
Now Edward is confused, and Bella fancies herself in love. No good can come of this. At least...not right now.
The Naked Guy Upstairs, Ch. 8Never try to sneak a hymen past a GYN. I also thought it was funny that the instant he realized that she was a virgin, he practically gave her an annual with the lights in the room. *snicker*
Once again, your clever banter comes into play when they start discussing introducing Bella to sex in phases. Professor Big Unit.
Finally, I think she will slowly discover her sexuality, and she will find that things that didn't appeal to her before might gain interest in the name of making her man happy. ;)
The Naked Guy Upstairs, Ch. 4-7Chapter 4
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What a way to unravel a relationship that has turned tense. A little sheet fort building during a thunderstorm. That whole scene was deliciously sweet. A soft kiss and other pleasant distractions. Isn't funny how we are willing to reveal the things that pain us when we are physically in a small space.
Louis, I think this is the beginning of a temporary friendship. ;)
Chapter 5
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Now the question is, will Edward reveal he knows what she says about him, or will he keep it in his back pocket to be used at a later date? He is in the perfect place to tease her to the point of madness knowing what she wants.
I am anxious how these two play out as a public pair.
Chapter 6
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Edward is the king of mixed signals in this chapter. One minute he is pinning her to himself and then her couch, and the next he is refusing what he teased. I know it is because this whole "feelings" thing is new to him, and I am sure it will be a while until he can reconcile that you can have both. I just think he wants to be so much more to Bella, but doesn't know what that is or how to get there.
In the meantime, Bella is floundering around the edge as much as he is. I don't think she is ready to trust him emotionally, but is craving him physically. If he confesses, will SHE run?
Chapter 7
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I am glad that the actual act itself is beginning in a slow sensual way. I was so worried it would be as stiff and contractual as the arrangement itself. I am so pleased that Edward was honest about his emotions and what she means to him. I hope in turn, that Bella realizes that this is not from his play book. He is operating a bit blindly, as well.
The Naked Guy Upstairs, Ch. 1-3Chapter 1
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Well, at least when her ovaries explode, he will be there on the spot to fix them.
I like the start of this. I enjoy a story that starts off with a completely awkward moment. Looking forward to see how their interactions progress with her guard now up, and his want to um, cough, go down.
Chapter 2
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Naked ass is an ass. Looking forward to getting into the deeper psychosis of this behavior later in the story. Or maybe you will just keep him superficial. I will have to wait and see.
I can see the emergence of your great banter, which I always loved between your characters. This Bella is a bit more shy than the others have been.
Chapter 3
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Poor Bella. She sounds like she has been the odd man out for so long that she no longer knows how to be anything but. I am curious what you plan to do with Jake's character. If he is just going to be a friend, or a crazy stalker guy. ;)
Edward has let down his usual facade for a moment to step in ready to rescue the damsel. Little did he know that the damsel was full of piss and vinegar...or liquor in this case. I think, for once, he is at a loss with a woman, and it intrigues him.
Stolen Singer, Ch. 9Hmmm...I am thinking that I am seeing the groundwork you are laying. It will be interesting to see if my hypothesis are correct as the story unfolds. Part of me is hoping I am wrong.
We are hanging on the edge of something right now with neither Edward nor Bella being honest about what they are feeling. She is still scared of this still VERY new existence with these strangers. Edward is afraid too much truth will scare her away. I am just concerned that his lack of truth will lose her in the long run.
You are going to hurt my heart, aren't you. I'm onto you.
Stolen Singer, Ch. 8Now that Bella has reconciled the idea that Edward and her Angel are one and the same, now it is time for her to start discovering the man he is. In the meantime, Edward's attachment is already there, and he is soon going to have trouble holding back his love/lust for her, or he is going to withdraw from her.
I am no concerned with whether Bella will find forgiveness for Jasper before the Volturi arrive to deal with this situation. I am not sure which will happen at this point yet.
Counterpoint, Ch. 26This chapter was a perfect example of the state of mind of a depressed human. There was self-destructive behavior, but it is not being done to actually cause harm to one's self, but because you just don't care enough NOT to do it. It was particularly striking in the fact that he hadn't bathed, at all, since coming back from Thanksgiving.
It is interesting that he is trying to get info from Emmett. He is also desperate for the answers. The intellectual is looking for a schedule for when things will be OK again. You display this well in his emails with Carlisle. When C doesn't offer the answer he wants, he is petulant to him in return.
These next few chapters will be painful to read.
