Rhapsody, Ch. 1-6
Chapter 1
-----------
So while FailFiction is on hiatus on giving me reviews or updates, I thought I just might search out some new stuff to read, and I landed here.
What an absolutely intriguing first chapter! You have not only set up what these characters look like, and what it is they do to pass the time, but you have woven complex character traits and desires in the first notes of your symphony. I not only can see your characters, but I can feel them already.
Beautifully orchestrated start. I can't wait to read more tomorrow!
Chapter 2
-----------
It sounds like he has reigned in a bit of the OCD from his youth. It's OK to like order. I love that he is a foody.
Sounds like Bella is going to have to be the aggressor in this relationship, though he doesn't run off or shy away once she does get the conversation rolling. Once they do get talking, there seems to be easy flow between the two of them. I hope it continues.
I am thinking that Jasper is taking Edward to a certain new restaurant...
Chapter 3
-----------
Excuse me as I step outside in the below freezing weather to cool off for a moment...
I was NOT expecting that! Holy shit that was one of the hottest moments I've read in fic, and I think the surprise had EVERYTHING to do with it. ::giggle::
Bella obviously likes an emotional order as much as Edward craves physical order. I am hoping next chapter finds her showing up at Edward's door and not allowing him to run and hide in needless shame.
Chapter 4
-----------
I love your Alice in this story. Her intuitiveness giving a shout out to her canon self. I like how direct and unapologetic she is as well.
I am glad I was right about the restaurant. It demonstrates to Edward a shared love of food that he and Bella have, as well as keeping her on the forefront of his mind.
I was so hoping you would have her show up at his door, though the meeting itself didn't go as I expected, and I love you for it. That boy's rabbit hole runs deep, and I think you have only shown us the surface.
Chapter 5
-----------
That was confused and sexy and needy and just right.
Poor Edward. What a past. This chapter did help explain his self-loathing and deprecation. I have a feeling that only time will prove to Edward that Bella's feelings are real, that she is not going to hurt him, and that he can trust her with his heart.
Looking forward to seeing if he does make the next move, or if Jasper will have to intercede.
Chapter 6
-----------
First off, quit fucking apologizing for your story. It is our jobs as readers to give ourselves over to you and the journey you choose to take your characters on. That is the fun of it. Your choices and pace are what make it exciting and unpredictable. If a reader wants to dictate how a story should go, then they should write their own damn story.
I love how they have begun to feed off of each others bravery. This chapter saw them feeding off the emotion of the other, and then having the courage and trust to give back, to ask for what they want, to surrender to what they need.
Finally, piano sex FTW!
Chapter 1
-----------
So while FailFiction is on hiatus on giving me reviews or updates, I thought I just might search out some new stuff to read, and I landed here.
What an absolutely intriguing first chapter! You have not only set up what these characters look like, and what it is they do to pass the time, but you have woven complex character traits and desires in the first notes of your symphony. I not only can see your characters, but I can feel them already.
Beautifully orchestrated start. I can't wait to read more tomorrow!
Chapter 2
-----------
It sounds like he has reigned in a bit of the OCD from his youth. It's OK to like order. I love that he is a foody.
Sounds like Bella is going to have to be the aggressor in this relationship, though he doesn't run off or shy away once she does get the conversation rolling. Once they do get talking, there seems to be easy flow between the two of them. I hope it continues.
I am thinking that Jasper is taking Edward to a certain new restaurant...
Chapter 3
-----------
Excuse me as I step outside in the below freezing weather to cool off for a moment...
I was NOT expecting that! Holy shit that was one of the hottest moments I've read in fic, and I think the surprise had EVERYTHING to do with it. ::giggle::
Bella obviously likes an emotional order as much as Edward craves physical order. I am hoping next chapter finds her showing up at Edward's door and not allowing him to run and hide in needless shame.
Chapter 4
-----------
I love your Alice in this story. Her intuitiveness giving a shout out to her canon self. I like how direct and unapologetic she is as well.
I am glad I was right about the restaurant. It demonstrates to Edward a shared love of food that he and Bella have, as well as keeping her on the forefront of his mind.
I was so hoping you would have her show up at his door, though the meeting itself didn't go as I expected, and I love you for it. That boy's rabbit hole runs deep, and I think you have only shown us the surface.
Chapter 5
-----------
That was confused and sexy and needy and just right.
Poor Edward. What a past. This chapter did help explain his self-loathing and deprecation. I have a feeling that only time will prove to Edward that Bella's feelings are real, that she is not going to hurt him, and that he can trust her with his heart.
Looking forward to seeing if he does make the next move, or if Jasper will have to intercede.
Chapter 6
-----------
First off, quit fucking apologizing for your story. It is our jobs as readers to give ourselves over to you and the journey you choose to take your characters on. That is the fun of it. Your choices and pace are what make it exciting and unpredictable. If a reader wants to dictate how a story should go, then they should write their own damn story.
I love how they have begun to feed off of each others bravery. This chapter saw them feeding off the emotion of the other, and then having the courage and trust to give back, to ask for what they want, to surrender to what they need.
Finally, piano sex FTW!
Post a Comment