Diseased Affair - Chapter 31

Chapter 31 - Crazy Love

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4849197/31/Diseased_Affair

The Arrangement, Ch. 22

Awww...kisses. Two updates. Two thanks in Hopey author notes. You complete me. :)

What a sobering position for Alice to be in. She was at a crossroads in this chapter. She could have walked away from the mess of these three friends, but she patiently listened to their tragic tale of their fall from grace, and willingly walked into the vortex. I love this Alice. She is patient and kind. She is the calm for once.

Finally, Edward is leaving. It will be interesting to see how you play this one out. I trust you.

elusiV, Ch. 5-6

Chapter 5
-----------
I am happy we are entering more actively into the foray of Bella's abilities. We now have a murdered girl lurking. I am eager to see what role she plays. I have sone guesses.

Then, we have Bella being actively courted by two delicious men who are also pursuing each other. I love that you have made this a delicious arrangement instead of a love triangle...so far, anyways. :) You write glances and subtle sexuality very well.

Finally, you hit us with Jane! Can't wait to see what this means!

Chapter 6
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Bella is going to work for the man. No good can ever come of the brothers & their guard, but we'll wait and see. I am excited that we will be seeing her powers unleashed, and how that intensifies her connection with Edward and Jacob. I could see the scene in the cemetery before my eyes as if I was looking at a movie coming to life.

OK, that feeding business is some of the hottest shit. It is the eroticism of penetration and taking someone into you, but on a whole different plane. Their external, physical closeness followed by Edward being nourished by what gives them life. Who knew that would be so damn sexy.

New Boy Blues, o/s

This was a beautiful tale of the makings of first love. This is the first J/E fic in which they are shy awkward teenagers. My favorite part is that their sexuality made them reserved and anxious about approaching each other, but was not the antithesis for any drama. We simply have to teenagers experimenting, not only with physical love, but dancing on the edge of their first experience with romantic love. This was sweet and shy and beautiful.

Loved it! Good luck in the contest, and I look forward to see more from you in the future!

We Three, Ch. 2

I am glad you did not shirk in the face of complexity. This was a beautiful moment between these lovers. I loved how you didn't shy from the fact that these were two virgins, and allowed their insecurities and curiosities be known.

What a lovely first year.

Devil's Angel, Ch. 1

I would love to know which bike Edward is riding. I see him on something vintage that he has fixed up, even though he could probably afford the newest top-of-the-line. I can always send some links, but knowing you, you have already researched this. :)

I like how you have already set up some sort of past for him. There is something public that he has been through, and a reason he shies away from people he may run into on a daily basis. Very intriguing!

I can't wait to go on this ride ::snicker:: with you!

All I Ever Knew, Ch. 21

I totally forgot about this conversation until I started reading. :) I'm happy you used it. It worked well. Everything with the gift exchange was very casual and cute in their awkwardness and concern on the other liking their gift.

I felt a little tug at my own heart at Jasper's realization that his parent's house was no longer home, but Edward was. I can't wait to see how his telling his family plays out. Hopefully well, though it has been a while since you fed us any angst. ::gives you a leering stare::

Now for the couch business...I'm going to require Mr. Bethie to work out what that did to/for me. Damn, girl!

My Yes, My No, Ch. 1-5

Chapter 1
-----------
I am so pleased to see you exploring this part of the canon. It always bothered me that she just took him back after he completely broke her. That the only pause she had was doubting the reality of the situation (barf). Why should she believe that the lie was a lie? Why should she trust anything he says? What promise could he make to set things right?

So looking forward to seeing what you do here.

Chapter 2
-----------
It's like you climbed in my brain and wrote this just how I like it. I could feel my heart pang several times through this and I love it! Yet, at the same time, I am standing behind Bella nodding at everything she is saying. I love this, Lo. REALLY love this.

Chapter 3
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I am not sure how to define this path. Avoidance; no. Acceptance; not quite. Every word that comes to mind doesn't seem to encapsulate it. I guess, Bella is just going with the path that will give her what she wants, and that is Edward. She is willing to trust that he is not leaving again, and is allowing herself to be wanted and loved.

That last bit was smokin'! I feel unworthy of sending you my feeble texts.

Chapter 4
-----------
Wow. The magnificence of this side of the tale is that you are showing her pain, not through her own wallowing, but in what she is, not rejecting, but in her hesitance? To have the love of your life sitting there describing in painful detail how he wants you mind, body, and soul. Telling you he no longer can nor wants to hold back physically. And finally to have him paint a picture for you of the forever he envisions. Then to hear all of that and still not bring yourself to say the words that are screaming out from your heart. THAT is a broken spirit. Magnificent.

Chapter 5
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That's the funny thing about avoidance, the second you let your guard down, there is the problem waitig for you. In their desire not to hurt one another, they are laying a foundation built of sand.

Does AG know about your dry humps? She just might ask you to move to NH and commit to you forever.

elusiV, Ch. 2-3

Chapter 2
----------
So, I am trying to decide if it is Bella's absolute sexual frustration that has her wound so tight, or if the "undead/supernatural" releases the Nile.

I can't wait to watch Bella find her place in this community.

Chapter 3
----------
Bi-sexual Edward. ::falls ded::

This chapter was very sexy. I look forward to how the relationship of these three unfolds!

Guarding Edward, Ch. 42

I am so happy to see the family settling in, and helping carve Edward's nitche in the group. I love that Edward is a traditionalist when it comes to holidays. I also liked the rules to keep the girls from going nuts.

The inclusion of the pack is a nice touch. It's the closest these guys get to having kids around on Christmas morning. :)

Hydraulic Level 5, Ch. 24

Bless Bella and her restraint. I think, if anything it shows how deep the wounds run. Only a well damaged heart would allow a moment's pause when your soul's other half is asking to kiss you, and pressing his beautiful body into yours. I think this speaks volumes to the fact that, though they are making great strides in building their relationship, they are still miles apart.

I have a feeling that the rest of this weekend is going to seal their fate one way or another. :(

Art After 5, Ch. 54

Bella introduced Charlie to her relationship with Edward. Not surprised that he took it as he did. Bella wouldn't be the tower of emotional health that she is if he was happy for her.

I love how you are still showing their insecurities, and that things are all forgive and forget. That is nice in theory, but NEVER happens in reality. When you love someone so fucking much, and they hurt you, the scares from that always remain.

The Sacrificial Lamb, Alt. Epilogue

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! ILY.

The Training, Ch. 1

One of my favorite things you have written in this introductory chapter is Bella's mindset. Her need for this relationship. The way she fingered her collar as she drove to his house. How she was focused on his approval. How, when she failed him, it brought her to tears. I FELT her disappointment in herself. The self-loathing washed over me. You put me right in that moment. Fantastic.

This line made me laugh out loud, "Hell, no, I didn’t want eighteen. I didn’t want the eight I had coming."

Tremendous start, southern belle!

A House of Cards, Ch. 32-34

Chapter 32
-----------
I loved seeing them be a couple in love. Doing normal things like holding hands, curling up to listen to a book (Over The Top...nice), and just going to bed together.

I love that they are socializing and making friends. That they are growing as people and together.

Finally, I love that they are getting back to play. Perfect ending.

I have really enjoyed this leg of the journey. Watching Edward going from hollow man to a loving partner has been tremendous.

Chapter 33
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Mike and Jack!!!! SQUEEEEEE!!!! How long have you h00rs been planning this? I am so happy I didn't know about this, and had this wonderful surprise!

Jack and Mike are going to be fan-fucking-tastic together!

Chapter 34
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Hmmm...why do I not like the look of this. I'll trust you on this one. You have never let me down before.

Cocktails & Dreams, Ch. 29

I love Mrs. McCarty! That household reminds me of my best friend's house growing up. It was a small 3 bedroom house, and there were 5 kids, and everyone had to share rooms and stuff, but they were so loving and generous.

I am so happy that Bella was there in the end. Comforting Edward and caring for both he and Mrs. Masen. The end was especially sweet as she helped Edward bathe, and get him dressed and into bed.

I feel like I can breathe again. :)

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A Better Place to Be, o/s

This is my entry for the "For the Love of Jasper" contest.

Words: 4,619
Genre(s): Hurt/Comfort/General
Rating: Rated: M
Summary: Entry for the For the Love of Jasper contest. Bartender, Bella,
listens as her patron, Jasper, tells a tale of a night where he rediscovered
love and lost it once again. AH. M is for lemon.

The Office, Ch. 18

I am devastated in such a delicious way. You know I love my angst.

I knew this was coming, so I was prepared for what happened in Carlisle's office. What I wasn't prepared for was Edward vulnerability. His desperate attempts at every turn to tell her, show her, and make her see that she is his world. The text messages rendered me speechless.

Unfortunately, when one's world has been turned on its axis in the course of a day, the sight of something that I am sure to be innocent, will be misconstrued in the eyes of the person who doesn't know which way is up. It is hard not to disregard bracelets, flowers, words, and promises when you see your love in the arms of another.

I remain, as ever, hopeful. These storm clouds, shall too, pass.

A Little Crazy, o/s

Wow. I don't know where even to begin. I feel like I just got schooled by the master class.

I loved the format of this story. The days read like diary entries, yet were so hauntingly personal that I felt like I should look away.

I loved his tats! The fact that they were his souvenirs of his travels, and that this bad ass looking guy was like a WHO doctor! HOT!

Finally, the real feeling of their emotions. That they both were in love and were terrified of what it meant for them when their lifestyles truly clashed.

I LOVED this story.

Fore Play, o/s

This one made me laugh. I enjoyed all the sexual innuendos, and not only Edward jerking off in the Port-A-Potty, but Jasper and Emmett betting on it!

This culminated into quite the quickie, and the guy from the kitchen pointing out the jizz sliding down her leg. Ded.

Bedtime Stories, o/s

I really enjoyed this! I love the strangers meeting overseas set-up. The way she lingers on his hands, and their easy conversation. Then the move to his room and the hot lemon. Just when I felt you had missed your mark with their familiarity, you show your hand by revealing that this is vamp Bella and vamp Edward post-BD. Well, played.

I loved the moment of them laying in bed after making love wrapped in each other talking, and occasionally kissing. That was very sweet.

A Wish Coming True, o/s

This was a creative o/s. The idea of them getting what they wanted for a night. It gave them some play w/out losing the canon chastity. I love that you chose wishes that self-fulfilled the other, meaning, I think it was Edward hearing Bella that let them have their third base action.

There were a few typos. I find that a read through before you post catches a lot of those. :)

Sleepers, Awake: Wachet auf, ruft uns die Stimme, Ch. 23

I had a feeling you might take it here, but it doesn't make it any less of a mindfuck. What to do. What to do. Do you save Edward still, after you have already sacrificed so much for him? Do you spare his family and friends the pain of losing him? Do you do it all for love?

OR

Do you choose to stay alive? Spare Charlie and Rose the pain of your loss?

OR

Are these dreams just a subconscious reminder that she is loved. That she is significant to this world. That she may not be able to create in her fantasy land, but that she has a unique, creative voice in this world.

OR

This is all going to be the fantasy world of an autistic kid with a snow globe.

Who knows. Your tomfuckery knows no bounds! I love you for it!

Kick the Tires and Light the Fires, Ch. 13

Is it hot in here, or just your writing?!

I love that Edward confessed his feelings first, and then Bella found her own realization in her own time. The camping trip with the family was a great idea, and what a beautiful union of these two.

Edward Wallbanger, Ch. 9

First of all, let me state for the record, that I love it when I am right. The subtle is not so subtle now as the interest between the friends shifts towards the canon. I don't mind the shift. The change in line up was fun while it lasted.

I love how you are developing the relationship between Edward and Bella. There is the flirting and the less than subtle glances, but they are getting to know each other. They are introducing each other into each other's private worlds. Bella has now met 2 of the 3 harem, though she doesn't know that Edward is really down to 2.

I hope someone got a picture of Bella at the benefit to show Edward. :) Also, speaking of pictures and images, they imagery of Edward standing at the window at the end was beautiful. I could really picture it all.

Mr. Horrible, Ch. 33

Edward is so unbelievably great for Bella in your story. He is uncomprehendingly patient and aware of exactly who she is. She has a desire to please, yet hide from the outside world. Her thoughts are scattered and often hard to rein in, but that is what he loves about her.

She in turn, calms his neuroses.

They are the perfect blend of personality to balance and accept each other. It is the reason I am not the 69th, but the 8169th reviewer of this whirlwind of a story.

Art After 5, Ch. 52-53

Chapter 52
------------
I like Kate. You always want to hate the "other woman", but sometimes you just fucking can't. I like that you didn't make her a raving bitch or a saboteur. She is just someone who cares about Edward, and who couldn't once they got to know him. I love that they asked their questions and spoke their peace.

Now, pretty Bella, there is a handsome young man wanting you to back that ass up! Go get 'em!...or get it...

Chapter 53
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Finally, a realistic approach to anal sex. I don't care what people try to say, if any orifice is virginal, that shit is going to hurt. "Of course, he would think I feel tight. That's probably how ripping someone in two feels from the other end." That line had me dying.

I am happy they talked before and after about what they are feeling. Bella has to quit seeking contrition, and Edward needs to understand why Bella needs to have the holes when they were apart filled in. It is a rough journey, but they will work there way to living in the moment and looking towards the future, instead of the past.

Hydraulic Level 5, Ch. 23

What is this place we find ourselves? Is it a HAPPY place?! ::gasp:: jk These two deserve to heal. They deserve to get to know each other as adults, and learn to be friends at this stage in their journey. Most of all, I believe they deserve a second chance at love.

I am so sad for Angela's sister. Postpartum depression is no joke. I hope they can find a way to help out there, financially.

Finally, I wonder if Bella will start showing some restrain in her extra-curricular activities. That, maybe, she will find adventure enough in the rediscovering Edward.

Poughkeepsie, Ch. 67

Burying of Mouse had me snot sobbing. What is it about the way out wrote that big, knitting son-of-a-bitch that just kills me? I really connected with that guy.

The wedding was perfect, and I love that you had Rose broadcasting to Emmett. The symbiosis of the perfection of Edward/Bella and Jasper/Alice's love was in harsh contrast to Rose and Emmett at the end. Rose is so tragic in this story.

It was fun to see Jasper cut loose in the bedroom, as well. Rawr, or should I say 'Howdy, pilgrim'!

The Inspiration, Ch. 10

I love that you didn't have her bolt! I like that she stayed and had fun. I like a Bella with some spine.

Then she yelled the WTF out loud! SO FUNNY! I love that she didn't even stop there. She walks up and slaps the shit out of him! I was cheering her on!

Finally, their moment alone, confessions made, a searing kiss, and then her own piece of reality. We'll see how Edward reacts to that. Hopefully they can both be forgiving of the truth of who they are.

A House of Cards, Ch. 29-31

Chapter 29
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The great epiphanies in our lives often are a domino effect of realization. Now that Edward has realized that he loves Jasper, he is seeing that he has loved him much longer then he realized. He is seeing the jealousy he felt in the past for what it was, not desperation to be in the game, but because the love of his life was showing affection to another.

I love that Edward is almost going through that teenage first love experience. Jerking off alone to the thoughts of the object of your affection. Worried whether they will love you too. Wondering if they will like the idea that you desire them.

Chapter 30
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Edward's transition has been amazing, and it really culminated in this chapter. Instead of giving into Jasper's wishes as he has done in the past, despite his reservations, he gave him love instead.

Their love making scene was absolutely transcendent, and everything it should be. I love that you had Jasper straddling a sitting Edward. You made them physically equal, instead of one being in a submissive position to the other. Eye to eye. Heart to heart. Healing, loving, beginning.

Chapter 31
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I am dead. Trish writing fluff. Paddles!! (the crash cart variety, not the ones on your top shelf, bb)

This was so beautiful. The sincere unfolding of their feelings and their love. I love that you had Bella tell Jasper in the emergency squad to give his love with Edward a chance, and that she was sorry she wouldn't be there to see it. ::tear::

Then their first date! I love the playfulness of Jasper mixed with Edwards insecurity that was really just Jasper being thoughtful of Edward. In the end, Edward is stepping out of his past comfort zone, because he is secure in love.

I need a snuggle now.

The Sacrificial Lamb, Ch. 32-34

Chapter 32
-----------
It was great to finally see Alice in the flesh. I loved their dynamic as brother and sister. Very real. Also happy that Edward has been reunited with his friend, Jasper. You can tell by their rapport that they really have been friends for a long time.

Now, we need to get past the confusion of who Tanya is on Bella's part, and Edward and his need to always save Bella from himself.

Chapter 33
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::kicks chair across the room:: GONE! Selfish, selfish man. I know he thinks he is doing things in her best interest, but really, he is saving himself, and any heartache that may come from her being hurt.

You did an excellent job setting us up in the end, I must say. Gave them their argument followed by some great kissing and snuggling before dropping the Houdini on us. Well, played, ma'am.

Chapter 34
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James is alive. Yikes.

We all like a little love on the run with these two! I am looking forward to the sequel! Fedward gets his day in the sun.

Though, I really hope she starts gathering her stuff, pauses, and says "Before we go..." and slaps the shit out of him. Then we can move forward. ;)

Resident Geek, Ch. 18

Geekward would be happy to know that I am writing this review with Return of the Jedi on in the background.

His first time was perfect. I just wanted to hug him afterward. He cried, that sweet man. I wish he would find the nerve to release those words he is so desperate to say. I love the real elements that you mixed in, like the fact he was on her hair. It brings me into the store more than the highly romanticized versions we often find in the fandom.

Lovely moment.

Anything But Conventional, Ch. 26

What a beautiful, perfect ending of this chapter of this story. I love the gift he left her with! A way she can be with him while he is in a place he can communicate frequently with her, she can still have contact through his writing.

Their last night of making love was wonderous and connected, and everything it should be. A current of good-bye wrapped in the start of a future.

I have fallen for this story, Dawnie. Beautiful job, and I can't wait for pt. 2!

Restoration, Ch. 26

I loved this chapter! Emmett in his element is so refreshing. To see him enjoying his job, and then to have Alice walking through the war zone of hard rubber balls. Leaving a few blue balls in her wake, I am sure.

The Rose/Emmett reunion was hot, followed by his sweet gesture of making room for her in his physical world, and not just emotional.

Sinful In Seattle, Ch. 10

Great UST leading up to the kiss at the end of the chapter. All the lingering moments followed by an interruption or a retreat. It really made the moment in the kitchen sizzle.

It's nice to see them becoming more and more comfortable around each other. I am enjoying the pace of this story.

When Fiction Becomes Reality, Ch. 16

Bella = busted! You can't profess all you have felt for someone in a best seller, and not think they won't discover the truth.

I love the flirtacious nature of this chapter. His yellow towel fantasies and the flirty texts. They are both playing out desires that could be reality, if one of them would sac up and confess instead of waiting for the other to show their hand first.

At the Deep End, Ch. 19

The day is soon upon us. Introducing the boyfriend to Momma and Daddy Whitlock. Please let it be OK...please let it be OK...

I feel so bad for Edward in this chapter. I know Jasper is dealing with a lot of shit, but Edward is suffering in silence. I am happy Esme talked to Jasper and reminded him that he is loved, no matter what, and not just by Edward.

It is time for Jasper to let Edward in to all that he is feeling. All his anxiety. All his sorrow for pushing Edward "into the closet" so to speak. I would cry to see this relationship tarnished by emotional black outs.

Over the Top, Epilogue & Outtake

Epilogue
-----------
Oh, Katie darlin'. It is over. ::blubbering, sobbing, crying::

You gave them their perfect ending. I love that their child is biological, or as close to it that they can get. I like that they moved and adjusted their lives so they could focus on their family, and be the best daddies ever! :)

If anything, through and through, your story has left me hopeful. Hopeful that all families, no matter how people's hearts predestine them to love, will be accepted someday. We all deserve happiness and love.

Jack's Outtake
---------------
I am so happy that Jack is taking a chance, not only in the career shift, and moving away from his comfort zone (and the cause of his emotional pain), but in giving Jacey his card, he is opening himself up to the chance of reciprocated love.

The sex in this chapter was so hot, bb. I can see you at night asking the peen "Now describe how THIS feels". LOL! ;)

Spy Games, Ch. 13-14

Chapter 13
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Though I love that Bella is sneaking around trying to gain info on the personal side of Edward's house, I think she would be remiss to ignore the changes going on professionally. Time for her to amp up her A game in the office, and quit being so distracted by the peen. ;)

I love that she cornered him on the Sky Walk. That was great, and how she made herself totally irresistible. Next, Edward's apartment!

Chapter 14
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The lemon and his fantastic bed set up was awesome! I love the fact that he can see right into her room from his bed. Very sexy.

I think we are getting pieces of the fact that Edward's attention and obsession with Bella has everything to do with the woman she is and nothing about their competitive positions in their companies. Not that I don't think he will do what he needs to do to keep his company strong.

So, what is this muse bit, and what is Edward hiding in the room with the black door??

Counterpoint, Ch. 10-12

Chapter 10
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I love that Edward and Bella stood in her kitchen and had an entire conversation about the root of the phrase "you suck" followed by a detailed an honest conversation about fellatio. This is what is fantastic about your story. The end of the story, also shows it's counter balance. The fact that Bella talks calmly and easily about sexual acts and can have phone sex w/out blinking an eye, but stutters and stammers when it comes to discussing emotions.

I love Edward's confidence in his feelings. That is very humbling.

Chapter 11
-----------
Declaration of love chapter! It must be hard to love someone and wish you were a part of their lives when it happened only to realize that you were pre-pubescent at the time. Those things always seem to kick the gap back open, just as they move closer.

I am happy that they didn't immediately make love after Bella admitted to what she was feeling. She needs to see that there is more to love than the physical act.

Chapter 12
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I love how Bella walked Edward through this first experience. That she was encouraging and loving. That she reminded him that having an orgasm was not what made their coupling special. It was the fact that it was them. That this was love.

Edward at the beginning doing the scientific analysis of how to get Bella off was hilarious too. So great.

Guarding Edward, Epilogue 1-3

Epilogue 1
------------
I loved the way you had Edward composing music to the people he watched in his family. It was very fitting of his character.

I am also glad to see that the Quileute's seem like they will accept this lapse in the treaty. Celebration time indeed!

Epilogue 2
------------
Awww...I love that you have Alice reconnecting with her family! I like the modern twist you gave it as her connecting via Facebook, and then meeting up as a distant cousin. I think this will be wonderful for her.

I am glad to see that you had the mother and sister loving her, and wanting to keep her around and not lock her up. That was a sweet touch.

Epilogue 3
------------
I really like this light-hearted look at Rosalie. She is so often portrayed as the selfish bitch, so it is nice to see her just being a big sister. She is helping make plans for her family's future, and also welcoming the wolves and what happiness extending their family has brought.

This epilogue just made me smile start to finish.

The Fallout, Ch. 17-19

Chapter 17
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I am so happy that the girls are getting their harvest festival. They all deserve something to look forward to. Now, most of the family knows about Edward's plan for self-destruction, as well. There is no way they are going to let him do it.

The light-hearted moment in the garden was a nice reprieve. As the slightest glimmer of hope in finding a friend in Seth.

I am glad that Edward, in the past, shared the burden of knowing about Carlisle. He shouldn't have to weather that on his own.

Chapter 18
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Charlie has asked Edward to say good-bye to Bella with him. That is rough. Saying good-bye equals admitting that you are no longer holding out hope, and resigning to the fact that she is dead. Part of me thinks that minuscule bit of hope is all that is keeping Edward tied to this earth.

All I can say about that last paragraph is "Fuuuck". That is not how she should have found out. Though as stress levels are constantly on the rise in the bunker, subtlety is going right out of the window. Time for the family to regroup and move forward.

Chapter 19
------------
Jasper vision! Oh snap! I would like to know how they are going to play that little scene off.

I felt like Edward was a bit sabotaged by the Bella tribute. I mean, he knew it was coming, but to play her lullaby without his permission. How could Alice think that he would be OK with that?

The moments are the dance floor were nice, but I felt bad for Leah being snubbed only to have Edward accept dances from other. :( I like that you made Tanya a friend. So many want to make her the conniving bitch.

Finally, for them to have the conversation, and wrangle the humans, and have Carlisle come back to find EDWARD with human blood in his veins. THAT was shocking. Poor Edward. Always left appearing to be the asshole.

Derailment, Ch. 14

I loved the introduction of the Angela character! What a perfect friend of Bella to discover! Bella needs that maternal/big sister type of person in her life there. It was so great seeing Bella being cared for (not that Edward doesn't), but this is different.

Finally, it was sweet watching them start to blur and dance on the line between friends and something more.

Sleepers, Awake: Wachet auf, ruft uns die Stimme, Ch. 21-22

Chapter 21
------------
Edward was in Boston. She talked to him, listened to him play, and then Eblocked herself because of his lack of recognition and her shy obsession. That was devastating to see her run.

Then, the time came. Jake had to die. You not only have her kill him, but you left us with her without a memorial, and just a dead, bleeding out wolf in her lap. Cruel, cruel mistress.

P.S. I think, as a grand finale for this story when that comes, you should give us a YouTube of ‘Wachet auf, ruft uns die Stimme.’

Chapter 22
------------
Jacob got his burial and memorial. As I was rereading through this to write my review, I had the epiphany that this is how I was intended to feel in Eclipse, yet didn't. In this story, I was truly torn in who Bella should chose. I remain sorrowful that Jacob is dead. That his love came second to that of Edwards. I think it is even more hurtful, because Edward, for all we know, will never even know Bella as anything other than a girl he went to school with once.

I have no idea where the fuck you are going with any of this, and I love you for it.

The Office, Ch. 17

Here is the genius of your writing...I know what is going to happen next, and still, I am sitting here fretting over what the fuck is going to happen when he closes that door!

Also, rereading through this to review, I am once again AMAZED at the mastery of your sex scenes. The build up you provide...then it culminates in a symphony of words and lips and tongues and climaxes! You are the master class, wingman.

My favorite thing about this chapter is seeing Edward starting to dream of the future. He is fantasizing about everything from proposing to every day being with each other doing mundane things like preparing a meal. He wants it all. He wants her.

Edward Wallbanger, Ch. 7-8

Chapter 7
-----------
The beginning of the chapter made me all nostalgic of the Cheers episode where they do the "I hate you!" "I hate you more!" ::kiss:: If you are too young to know the reference, dear Alice, please lie to me, and don't make the Bethie feel old. Your version was even better with the slap, followed by her grabbing him for the second kiss.

I like the fact that you gave them a truce, and they are getting a chance to get to know each other as neighbors for now. Some civil discourse.

Also, I love that he heard HER, as well.

Chapter 8
-----------
The end of this chapter can be summed up in five letters: ROTFL!!!
When Clive attacks! That was some of the funniest shit ever. Then you smack some Pussy Control icing on that cake. I just might have to bump off Nina, and marry you, Alice. js.

The rest of the chapter was full of amazing subtlety and sad revelations. I was sorry to hear that your Edward was an orphan. That just makes my heart hurt. Then the subtlety, that I hope was intentional, with Rose and Alice's reactions while listening to the other describe the kissing of Jasper/Emmett. I think some couples are going to flop later.

Favorite chapter to date.

Bella and the Billionaire, Ch. 26-32

Chapter 26
------------
Edward is a single mother's wet dream. He really is the sweetest when it comes to Bella. I love how he has taken them both into his life with all of his heart. They both deserve a man like this in their lives.

Piano lovin' in the future? Can't wait!

Chapter 27
------------
I loved the paragraph where Edward was dreaming of their future together and the little nuances about Bella that he loved so much. It was such a beautiful idea. Sometimes the sexiest fantasies are those that don't involve sex at all.

You wrote their love making as a beautiful dance between desperation and gentle need. Lovely.

Chapter 28
------------
Nothing more beautiful than seeing Jacob and Renee being handed their asses! Fantastic!

Chapter 29
------------
A romantic evening, and a great fantasy wank in the shower ruined by Psycho 1 and 2. You write crazy in such a shocking, yet believable way. It is truly amazing that your Bella has any ounce of sanity herself!

I am glad that it appears that her days dealing with them will be most likely rolling to a close.

Rose is awesome!

Chapter 30
------------
FINALLY! Hopefully these psychos are out of Bella and Charlie's lives forever! Uncle Caius was awesome. We need more judges like him. I have no patience for abuse of any sort.

Chapter 31
------------
LOL! This was the perfect proposal for these two. Him blurting out the question with no precursor, and her screaming an orgasmic yes. This is the acceptance you get when you abstain forever. ::giggle::

I love the idea of them getting married in the backyard with just those nearest and dearest. It suits them.

Chapter 32
------------
Holy rabbit fucking, Batman! How many damn kids do they have now?
Charlie (16), Esme (12), Anthony (6), Carlisle (2), Alec (10 mo.), and fetus. Though I can't blame Bella. If I was married to billionaire Edward who worshiped me, I would carry his spawn until my uterus gave out, too.

I love the whole Charlie and Lily bit too, and how Edward is torn between patting him on the back and strangling him. :) And how he is on his own w/ Emmett. hehehe. So funny that Bella and Rose know, and went with Lily to get the birth control. Better safe than grannies.

You gave them a wonderful ending.

Tropic of Virgo, Ch. 37

What a lovely gesture to end this story with a new beginning. A glimpse of the future of these talented teenagers. Though I must say that I was struck dumb with the initial imagery of Edward standing naked at the window with just the brown ribbon. ::sigh::

Thank you for sharing your poetry and beautiful story with us!

Diseased Affair - Chapter 30

Chapter 30 - Peaceful, Easy Feeling

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4849197/30/Diseased_Affair

Shotgun Charlie, Ch. 42

I love how you wrote Bella's change! The beautiful mix of their union as a couple and Edward's taking her into eternity. It was tender. It was sexual. It was everything it should be.

Thank you for sharing this excellent story with us!

Art After 5, Ch. 50-51

Chapter 50
------------
One of the things I found most interesting about this chapter, is sort of the role reversal in the bedroom. There was Bella trying to have a serious conversation, and Edward kept making jokes. The last time, it was always Bella using her humor to divert Edward's seriousness. How times have changed.

And I like the sound of forever. :)

Chapter 51
------------
Awwww snap! Kate is the other girl in the bathroom. This is going to be ugly.

I would totally be like Bella when dress shopping. It would take some sort of sedation to get me to spend $1K on a dress. My own wedding dress only cost $300.

You know you have opened up a can of worms with the promise to later evening adventures. You know there are people in this fandom who will send you to the tower until you write the anal scene.

Brotherly Devotion, Ch. 6-7

Chapter 6
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The cat may be out of the bag now. Rose hinted she knew. Tanya practically assaulted Bella with her accusations. Then Alice walks in on them. I don't know if Alice saw Bella or not, but them moaning out each others names in the bathroom at a crowded party. Odds are not good.

But the thing I absolutely love about this chapter is how you had Edward react to Bella's ending things. Instead of being Emoward and clinking away in anger or defeat, he just turned and said no. That they were worth fighting for, and he loved her. I love that kid.

Chapter 7
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That Thanksgiving dinner was like a Mexican stand off. Everyone with their sights aimed on someone, everyone not making a move, but when the first shot is fired at dinner, it all falls down like dominos.

I feel the worst for Edward, but he should have known getting involved with a married woman, ESPECIALLY when said woman is his sister-in-law, that things would not work out easily, if at all.

I am glad Emmett and Bella had some sort of confrontation. They aren't even trying to talk for the most part. Glad something happened. Bella feels like she is falling apart, but really, the ball is starting to roll, if not slowly.

Confessions of a Nanny, Ch. 12

This was one of the hottest lemons I have read in a very long time. Even reading it a second time through, I am convinced that the temp in the room has suddenly gone up 10 degrees.

This was an amazing culmination of harsh words and long standing desire. Excellent!

...and anyone who can get tby789 to say 'pussy' gets cudos from me.

Hydraulic Level 5, Ch. 21-22

Chapter 21
------------
I have to state for the record how much I love the idea of friendship vows. We all silently promise those things to our friends, and I think if you can't do that, then you have no business using that word.

I am happy that Bella discovered that their fictional selves got a happy ending. Now, their real selves have a happy beginning...re-start, anyhoo.

Chapter 22
------------
It is so hard when you are put in a place where you have to start questioning and re-evaluating every truth you set up for yourself. Your truest genius is in Charlotte. I, myself, don't know what to think anymore.

I love seeing them getting to know each other as adults; as they are now. Bella was right on the ball field that only their physical distance could allow them to do this. Now that they have a familiarity, and even some flirting going, it will be interesting to see what happens once they are face-to-face again.

Rescue Me, Ch. 33

Everyone should have that friend that you can almost communicate silently with. I am happy that Bella has that in Jasper. I hope it is enough that she didn't seem to tell him anything.

Red car alert! If this is James, I am still so irked at her for not telling Edward. HE is going to be pissed when he finds out, and hopefully it is not in the middle of some shit storm. For now, I am going to trust you and be patient.

Poughkeepsie, Ch. 63-66

Chapter 63
------------
You consistently make me laugh out loud. The "we like to fuck other people" followed by the senior comment. I had to share with the husband. He looked at me like I was crazy.

I love seeing this rag tag group of people come together, merging into one powerful family unit. We all have the family we were born with, but those that we choose to add to it, by our own volition, have even stronger bonds, because the permanent connection is only there by will and love.

Chapter 64
------------
He's awake!

Emmett is right about one thing; Rosalie is going to string him up by his balls. I know he is the most upset he has ever been, but that was just retarded. Maybe his HEA starts with some jail time. Who knows. Well, you know. Don't tell me. Well, tell me when you get to the chapter where you need to tell me. Nevermind. ::headdesk::

Moving on...

Chapter 65
------------
Uncle Dr. Cullen. You know, the introduction of something like this at this point in the game could have easily been a 'shark jumper', but they way you crafted it, made it feel natural. A missing piece of the story, that we sensed but couldn't name.

It is great to see them easing back towards the magic which was the beginning. The teasing and loving and ease. The way you write their love, it feels like the most natural connection ever. Probably why so many of us flock to read about Hoboward & Bella.

Chapter 66
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Edward has a home. He has a job, make that jobs now. He has family, biological and adopted. He has his love. Good things come. Karma is real.

I am happy that the Swans seem to be closer than ever, and communicative, and sharing. Their is a veil that has been lifted from them, and I feel it when I read them.

I'll finish tucking Edward in after I put the casseroles in the freezer.

Cocktails & Dreams, Ch. 25-28

Chapter 25
-------------
That was mastery in chapter writing if I have ever seen one. You start us out with uncertainty. Bella's realization that she is going to have to face the truth of her evening. We are all anxious as we follow her to the backyard. Then, Charlie expresses his displeasure, but it soon turn joking and then sincere. I love the openness of their relationship. It demonstrates how honest this family is with each other, and the trust in one another that they can face each other even when they know a conversation won't be easy.

Next you dance us through the euphoria of the morning, afternoon delight, and the festivities at the reservation. Life is grand. Everyone is loving Edward. Edward is loving Bella, and life is good.

Finally, you pull the emotional rug out from under us. Edward says, out loud, that his father's stroke is the fault of their relationship. Gut punch. Rereading it now for the review has the tears tickling my eyes all over again.

Chapter 26
-------------
I was saying to someone earlier today that you are my ambassadress of heart fail lately, and that I wish I would have reviewed when I first read this, because re-reading it seems to be even worse, and masochistically enough, I love it! I love stories that make me FEEL, and yours does that in spades.

My favorite part about this chapter is the part about armor. How she didn't want to build any when it came to him, and none of us should have to when it comes to the people we love, but we are human. Sometimes, the stresses of life push us to do things we would never do in good consciousness. She has to allow for his humanity, as he allows for hers.

Chapter 27
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These two are a psychiatrist's wet dream. Between life's interruptions, his now insecurity, and her self-imposed isolation, this relationship is doomed. There is only so long you can leave someone hanging by a string before they choose to cut it themselves. Bella's choice might have just been made for her.

I am glad that Bella's closest friends gave her the "pull your head out of your ass" speeches.

Now, the next chapter is sitting in my inbox, and I can't wait to get to it!

Chapter 28
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::bullhorn on::
She's there! People she is there, and some promises of forever have been laid down. Pull your heads out of your ovens!
::bullhorn off::

Thank you for bringing her to Edward. I can't believe that it looks like the end for Big Ed. I hope he becomes stable enough to see, and maybe get to know Bella, even just a little, before he goes. Deep breath.

Creature of Habit, Ch. 31

Fav line: "Smells like home" ::snort::
...followed by “Yes, but never wear those in my presence okay?”

I love how you ended this by intertwining every last aspect of their lives, even the patrolling. One thing that I have loved about your Bella through this whole story is that she knows who she is. From the moment she washed his patio furniture in his Stones shirt to getting Edward to sleep with her, and realize his love for her. She has known what she wanted and gotten it.

OCDward, though still fervent in his ways, has softened on the inside. He has allowed love into his life, and is forever changed. Forever loved. Never to be alone in the night again.

The Sacrificial Lamb, Ch. 27-31

Chapter 27
------------
FBIward!!! I am so happy you went this route. I really didn't like the idea of Ratward.

Girlfriend is only going to be able to use the excuse of "I was in a traumatic situation" for so long when giving Jake the cold shoulder.

It was interesting to learn how Charlie officially became mixed up in this mess.

Chapter 28
------------
And now we know Edward's complete history. It's awesome that he took this awful situation, that he knew he had to become a part of, and did good with it. If his character wasn't hot before...

I feel so bad about his lingering doubt and need for Bella. When life comes between love, or in this case, the mob.

Chapter 29
------------
ARO! Na Na naaaaaa....

I have to admit. I kinda like Doucheward. Especially the "that was a perk" with the smirk. I love you, jerk.

I love how Jacob did the figurative pissing on Bella with the fiancee comment. So him.

Also, there is no better avoidance than unconsciousness. I wish Bella would have dealt with things instead of just hiding in her room, but she got what she orchestrated in the end of this chapter. Angry Edward, and now finding herself in the arms of Aro.

Chapter 30
------------
I was so sure at first, that Edward would come bolting out of the court house to find them both gone. I am glad this played out on the steps, and you didn't prolong another chase, etc.

I love how you brought all their training around to this moment. This moment when it was important. Once again, Edward saves Bella. What a man.

Chapter 31
------------
First of all, you freaked me out with that chapter title!

I am happy to see the end is of Bella and Jacob's relationship and not Edward's life. I am glad Jacob was so accepting, in the end. This seems to be something that was a long time coming. Where two people are staying together because it is comfortable, and not because it is right.

I love the intro of Jasper! Ever the voice of reason and calm.

Bella talking to Edward in his coma was so touching. Heart ached for them a bit. I can't wait to see what happens when he wakes up. What the future holds for them both.

A House of Cards, Ch. 25-28

Chapter 25
-------------
A return to Seattle, and he wants Edward to go with him. I guess what I am wondering if he is running from the memories created in Chicago, or running towards where he feels the start of his happiness, his truth, lies.

And I feel bad for Mike fucking Newton! You have made me fall in love with Mike Newton! God help me, part of me is rooting for the boy.

Chapter 26
-------------
Edward is going. I can't say I am surprised, but I will be interested to see how it all falls out from this decision.

The most captivating part of this chapter was the coming together of Edward's two selves. The boy he was and the man he is. That they can live harmoniously in his body. I, too, wish Bella was there for that moment.

Chapter 27
-------------
Ouch. I actually dropped an "Oh shit" out loud when Edward said he had been sleeping with Jasper out loud. Everyone deserves truth, but some truth is harsh. Especially presented like that.

Edward. Always feeling he is the root of all evil. He has to feel worthy of love before he can truly give Jasper his.

Chapter 28
-------------
Wow! There is some growth for Edward! Instead of taking what he wanted, even though his head was saying it was a bad idea, he just put Jasper to bed.

Now that he has said the words out loud to an unconscious Jasper, maybe he will find the courage to say them to him conscious. Especially in light of the "It has always been you." We all know who he was talking about.

New story from EJ Santry,

Title: Team Building

Category: Twilight
Character(s): Edward & Bella

Words: 4,426
Genre(s): Romance/General
Rating: Rated: M
Summary: Edward and Bella are off to a lodge for a weekend 'team building'
retreat for their office. Flirting, knee brushing, and rock wall climbing lead
to a real coming together of their team. AH. ExB. M. Lemon. Happy Birthday,
LolaShoes!

URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5366639/1/

Chapter 29 Title: That's How You Know
Words: 3,249

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4849197/29/